I am not sure what I’m doing, in my general life and right at this moment.

I do know that my blog on blogger is consistently spammed. And, I don’t like it. 

Time to start something new!

Maybe there will be more photos!

Maybe there will be more poems!

Today, I realized how much caffeine really is a drug. It is something I learned because I work in a coffee shop, and today I drank iced coffee like water. It was fun for a while, but I think I’m going back to the seltzer during work. Nothing feels like the refreshing burn of seltzer!

Also, ever since I was accepted into the Lesley MFA program (starts in June), I haven’t been writing at all. That isn’t good. Maybe this will provide a new and exciting outlet for me. I don’t know!

I wish someone would play a game with me right now! 

I think I’m going to chop off my hair again, soon. If I get a jobby-job, that is the first order of business. Not that I want a jobby-job, but it gives me an excuse to REFRESH myself.

I’ve decided that if I don’t get an office job soon, I’m going to start applying for prep cook positions elsewhere. I love where I work, but it would be nice to have a new scene. Maybe I’ll do both barista-time and prep-cook time somewhere else!

As for meditation, I will be signing up for another workshop soon. I should meditate every day, but like going to the gym, I don’t. I find that I am sporadic in my hobbies and wellness plans. You could call me a jacktress of all trades, mistress of none. Even my vegetarianism has become skittery. That is what happens when you work in a kitchen! Those smells! 

And, as for love, that is the one consistent and wonderful thing about my life. There is love all the time. Love is important. This love I have right now for this one person is not just romantic love. It is home love. He is a home. I could go anywhere in the whole world and be home anytime I want to be, because of him. Home is where the heart is! Right? I can tell you that it really is right! 

Recently, I had a dream where I was being slowly chased by one of the regulars who come into my cafe. It was in a giant sterile-feeling mall. He was creeping up the escalators with a zombie-look to him. And, then I heard the booming laugh of my father filling up the entire building. HA HA HA HA HA. Not sure what the meaning of that dream was, but it does make me want to quit my job! I definitely can’t look this customer straight in the eye anymore without getting a little uncomfortable.

Oh, dreams.